All relationships have unique struggles. Still, there are common problems that people in specific romantic arrangements can encounter. For gay men, there remains a good amount of public stigma when it comes to acceptance and even tolerance of their relationships. Hate crimes and prejudice are not the only obstacles gay men face. In many cases, they also have to deal with a number of very strange and bizarre issues both internally and from the world at large. From comments that are too silly to be offensive to cringe-worthy personal questions, these are a few of the weirder problems.

Gay Men Face Intense Questioning

“Coming out” and accepting one’s own sexual identity is an incredibly personal journey. Unfortunately, the public at large tends to view it as a mandatory condition for many members of the LGBT community. A person who never announces his sexuality might have to field all kinds of uncomfortable questions from coworkers when they discover that he is in a relationship with a man. While being interested in a friend’s personal life is normal, a number of gay men have commented on how intense people can get with their questions.

How Do You Know?

Plenty of gay men hear the question, “How do you know you’re actually gay?” Weirdly, the number of times a gay man may be asked this question does not go down the longer a person is out of the closet. Asking someone to define why he or she is interested sexually in a particular gender is not casual conversation. For many men, it isn’t a topic to be discussed in the break room or around the family dinner table. Interestingly, very few straight people have reported being asked the same question when announcing a relationship with a person of the opposite gender.

The Brother Conundrum 

Another bizarre situation that gay men sometimes have to field is the “brother conundrum.” When two men in a relationship are roughly the same skin tone and height, people often assume that they are brothers. While thinking this is one thing, a huge number of gay men have had experiences where waiters, associates, or total strangers will come out and say “are you brothers?” Not only is this uncomfortable because it assumes the two men are related when they are romantically linked, it forces the men to address the nature of their relationship with a complete stranger. 

While it can lead to some funny anecdotes, gay men don’t understand this phenomenon. This is not exclusive to gay men, either. Lesbian women also deal with this kind of questioning at the same pace. Straight couples also encounter this issue now and again, though the numbers are drastically lower than with same-sex couples. 

Enjoying the Perks

Though there are a lot of weird and wacky ways that people will interact with people in gay relationships, there are also a number of perks that gay men admit to enjoying. A same-sex romantic arrangement makes certain activities easier or less involved. When you have a similar body type as your partner, for example, you can share clothing. Men in same-sex relationships also tend to have an easier time satisfying romantic partners in a sexual way than their straight counterparts, as there is already a bit of built-in knowledge and experience on personal stimulation. 

A Changing World

All relationships experience ups and downs. What is an everyday annoyance for people in one arrangement might never come up for individuals in another type of relationship. For gay men, a number of issues are more annoying than they are wildly problematic. Luckily, the world is becoming a more tolerant place. As more people continue to educate themselves and think before asking specific questions, it will become easier to create a world where people in all relationships can feel comfortable and confident in their love.